Why leave home?
Ever since I studied abroad in London in 2012 (which included visiting Wales, France, and Italy) I have needed the growth that comes from travel. There is a magic that comes from being far from home. For me its the loneliness combined with newness that enables me to reflect holistically about myself and what I need. I become more caring to myself, because my support systems are farther away. I become more adventurous because I don't know the area so my only choice is to explore. It isn't easy for me being away form home and that's the point. I'm pushed to grow and growth is my constant. When I travel from home I have to confront my fear of being forgotten by those I love. When I travel I have to confront the questions : If I'm not there to give to those I love will they stop loving me? Am I worth the additional challenge of using technology or communicating through different time zones? These questions and fears all came up because I dared to travel. Through travel I have an opportunity to sit with these fears/questions and heal these unloved parts of me that think this way.
My first serious impulse to leave Maryland was after my heart was broken, I ended my first relationship and graduated college, all of which happened in the same semester. Right after graduating in 2015, I went to New Jersey to work at a sleep away arts camp and made friends from all over the country and world. Then, I came back home to familiarity and where my ex was still very much apart of my friends and social circle. So pain and escape was definitely a top motivation to leave.
A year later, after healing some, I deiced to stay in Maryland and live on my own for the first time.I wanted to experience the DMV on my own as an adult (Which was so worth staying ). But in September, when I moved into my first apartment in Downtown Silver Spring to start my first full time job in Riverdale, MD I realized I had been in Maryland too long. I grew up in Wheaton, Maryland, went to the University of Maryland, now I'm living 15 min from where I grew up and working 10 min from where I went to college? How did I become this person who lives where she grew up? I told myself after my job ends I'm leaving. So I did.
Ann Arbor Chill'in
I applied and accepted an executive internship with a2ru which I start tomorrow! I moved in yesterday. I live in a 2 bedroom apartment and I'm surrounded by lots of trees and greenery. I love my room I just need a mattress and bedding. I have 1 roommate which is wonderful. She picked up 3 furniture items I purchased via Facebook before arrived, picked me up from the airport, took me to the grocery store on the way home, built my bed frame, and gave me her old desk. The kindness of strangers is real! The universe is truly looking out.
Today I went exploring! I walked and just kept walking for over an hour. I discovered 2 parks, a trail to run/walk, the Amtrak/Greyhound station, and a lake to canoe down. I love the freedom of walking and not knowing where I am going! I walked, ran, and swung swings!
I start work tomorrow and already have about 4 people that are friends of friends to meet! My adventure is starting out wonderfully. I told a friend the other day I don't know what is coming up in this journey but I know it's mine. Usually I choose to be fearful of the unknown and I'm learning to allow fear to have its space, but allow something else to drive me. Maybe adventure, curiosity, courage? I'm not sure yet but trust and patience is my new motto and I'll let fear take a step back...
Til Next Time <3
Accountability Statement :My goal is to post at least once a month around the 19th of each month :)
